Greenwitch

I feel sooo dissapointed with myself tonight, a week ago I was rather ill with this chest infection, just cough coughing all the time and so out of despiration , I braced myself and made chicken soup as i figured it was still better than going onto medication.

I ate the soup and it was neither here nor there the chicken tasted like tofu and the surrounding stew yummy and it did help with the coughing .

The problem was the mess was in my body (hind sight) so we went out to a resturant late at night to celebrate and there was no vegetarian option on the menu at a thai resturant and me not wanting to be a party pooper said fine i'll just have a little of what everyone else is having which means i had lots of coconut rice and some lamb shank !

then tonight i actuall was craving meat....so I though OK its friday and k loved spaghetti Bolonaise so i shall make it for him.

What happened ? what got in to me . See you only need to partake of death once and then its inside you ! and you become death like a vampire craving blood.

I now have a feeling of wax in my mouth and my chest is painful, I feel so ill, I am actually hopeing that I throw it all up. I am so dissapointed in my self.....I will never degrade body this way again !